


Look My Way

by ashleyy15, BiteWrite



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Fluff and Angst, Longing, M/M, Possible smut, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-02
Updated: 2013-12-24
Packaged: 2018-01-03 06:15:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1067059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashleyy15/pseuds/ashleyy15, https://archiveofourown.org/users/BiteWrite/pseuds/BiteWrite
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I don’t love you.” Who knew one sentence could break a heart?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Confession

**Author's Note:**

> Rated M for possible smut in later chapters.

“I don’t love you.” Who knew one sentence could break a heart?

     When someone falls in love, they hope the significant other could return their feelings. The single hope they have of being loved in return is what gives them confidence in confessing their feelings. Because confessing requires a great amount of bravery and love. That’s what urged Eren into confessing his feelings for his childhood hero.

     _I think I like you, Corporal._

_I don’t love you._

Levi’s words hurt. But Eren was determined to not show just how much those words had affected him. He put on a smile instead and tried to keep his tears back. “O-oh, I-I was just joking, s-sir.” He said, voice cracking and all. “I apologize for interrupting, sir.” He said quickly before turning abruptly and leaving the room. The second his back was turned to face the corporal, the tears came.

     Even now as he lay down on his bed, he keeps thinking of Levi’s expressionless face when he confessed. If Levi had punched him or even break his bones, it wouldn’t hurt as much as a broken heart.

     Eren wishes he could get over Levi just by snapping his fingers or maybe even hate the man, but he found it impossible for him to do so. _Why?_ Levi obviously didn’t feel the same way, so why was he still trying so hard to please him, still falling for him just as much?

     In the dark, Eren tries to not wake his roommates up with his sobs. He forces the cries down his throat so only silent tears escapes. It hurts his throat, but it is better than having Armin or worse, Jean to catch him crying in the dark like some baby. If the others ever know his reason for crying, he couldn’t ever live it down without becoming embarrassed when someone mentions it.

     So he uses his pillow to muffle the cries. Soon, sleep took over him, leaving him to fall asleep with tears stained on his face.

\--

“Wake up, Eren!”

     Eren groans. He isn’t a morning person, that’s for sure. But nonetheless, he pushes away his sleeping covers and stretches, feeling the sore muscles on his back. After tidying up his bed(Eren had tried cleaning his bed as a way to impress Levi so many times that somehow it became a daily routine.), he pulls on his uniform, still a little hazy from waking up early.

     “Suicidal bastard looks worse today.” Eren hears Jean say to Armin.

     Usually, he would have quickly jumped into a fight, only to get his ass beaten. But this morning he feels so out of it that he just dismisses Jean’s words and stands up, ready for breakfast. Well, as ready as he can be.

     When Eren and his friends enter the dining hall, his eyes automatically search for Levi. As usual, Levi is sitting with his squad members. The others are laughing at something Petra said, but Levi just keeps his face expressionless as always. As if he feels someone staring at him, his eyes somehow meet with Eren’s. The events of yesterday come rushing back to Eren and he feels his cheeks growing warm just the slightest bit.

     Beside him, Armin looks at him with worry. “Eren, you should go ahead and sit with Mikasa. I’ll get your food.”

     “Yeah, you look kinda sick and flushed.” Connie adds, appearing beside him.

     “Oh yeah, I suppose I am a little tired from being experimented.” Eren says as he silently thought ‘ _Stop blushing, stop blushing, stop blushing._ ’

     “You mean Squad Leader Hanji is still doing experiments on you?” Armin asks, a little curious when it comes to one of the scientist’s experiments. Not that he doubts her ability to gain more information, but it has been a long time since any of them receive news about new ways to eradicate the titans.

     Eren decides on not answering Armin on that one. So he goes over to where his sister sits and plops down next to her. Already he could feel Mikasa’s stare on him. Unlike the others, Mikasa knows Eren would rather sort his problems out himself and that if he needs any help, he can always go to her or Armin. So she just keeps quiet and watches her brother with a solemn look.

     When Eren’s food came, he quickly gobbles it down. He wants to faster get over breakfast and head off to his training with Petra. But mainly he wants to avoid his friends’ questions. He knows they are worried about him and how everything was affecting him. But he’s scared, he’s worried that if he answers anything, it might lead back to whatever happened.

     “Didn’t you get enough sleep last night?” Armin asks.

     “Y-yeah, I did.” Eren hates lying to his best friend, but it has to be done.

     “Liar.” He glances at Jean, wishing the horse face could just disappear.

     “What do you know, Jean?” Eren asks, shooting him a glare.

      A smug look crosses Jean’s face and Eren feels his stomach drops. “Didn’t you cry last night? Your sobs actually kept me awake.”

     Beside him, Mikasa turns to him with a worried look. “Eren, is something wrong? Why were you crying?”

     “Nothing’s wrong!”

     “Ah, but you’re not denying that you cried last night.”

     “Did something happened, Eren?”

     “No, nothing happened! Just stop it!”

     “So why do you have tear stains this morning?”

     Unable to take it anymore, Eren stands up and shouts, “ _I did not cry last night! Leave me alone!_ ” His friends shut up and stare at him in shock. This isn’t the first time Eren makes a scene in the dining hall, but usually it is about eradicating titans or bickering with Jean, never about him crying.

     “Eren...”

     That’s when he realizes everyone in the dining hall stop eating and he was the centre of attention. Even worse, Levi from all the way across the room is watching him with surprised eyes. He can feel his face warming and he runs out of the place as quick as he can.

\--

Eren sits under the tree and hugs his knees to his chest. Confusion, anger, sadness, bitterness and love fill him, making him even more confused. All he thought of when he ran away from the hall was getting away from everyone. So that’s how he ended up under the tree near the training grounds. None of the soldiers are training yet so he is grateful for the silence that follows when he lets his tired legs rest.

     “I am so stupid.” Eren mumbles as he buries his face in his arms.

     “Oh yes, you are.” He immediately freezes at that voice.

     _No no no no no._ Out of all the people that come find him, why must it be him? He musters up a (hopefully) expressionless face before looking up at the corporal. “Morning, sir.”

     Levi sighs, softening his expression before taking a seat next to Eren. His mimics Eren’s position and pulls his knees to his chest as well. “So...was what Kirschtein saying true? Did you really cry like a baby?”

     Eren lets out a dry laugh. “Oh no, Corporal, I was just peeing through my eyes.”

     Levi makes a disgusted noise. “That is disgusting, Jaeger.”

     “I’m kidding.”

     “I know.”

     Eren wonders how strange it is that making a conversation with Levi came naturally. It’s like the events of yesterday had never happened. As both of them sit under the tree with the breeze blowing against their faces slowly and steadily, Eren could almost forget the danger that lurks outside the walls. It is so peaceful, just sitting beside the person he loves most.

     “Hey, what’s your blonde friend’s name again?”

     “Hmm? Armin?”

     “Ah, I heard he’s having a relationship with miss Reiss.”

     “Yes, he is.” Eren silently hopes he hasn’t gotten his best friend in trouble. Armin and Krista had started dating a few days ago, everyone expected it to happen at some point but they only kept their relationship known within their group of friends.

     “Hmm, why now when titans are still attacking?” Levi asks, taking a glance at the brunette.

     Eren didn’t seem to notice as he kept staring at the horizon. “Krista says that’s why they decided to start the relationship.” When Levi still looks at him in confusion, Eren continues, “’You’ll never know when we could die so we might as well enjoy the time we have with the one we love, right Eren?’ was what she said.”

     Levi nods, looking like he understands. Then he abruptly stands and pats away the dust on his clothes. “Miss Reiss sure speaks wise words,” he mumbles. Turning to Eren, he says, “Training starts in ten so stop moping around, brat.”

     Eren watches the corporal’s retreating back, feeling a bit relieved that Levi still acts normal around him. But at the same time, there’s this ache in him and he wishes he could just wrap his arms around that small body of his and just not let go.

     _You’ll never know when we could die so we might as well enjoy the time we have with the one we love._

“ _Corporal...just please love me back...”_


	2. Beginnings

Training went by as usual and Eren didn't see Levi for the rest of the day. His friends avoided the topic about Eren's little outburst during breakfast. Though none of them mentioned it, Eren could still feel the tension in the air. So even now as he walked back to his room with a sweaty body and muddy shoes, he could still feel his friends wanting, _itching_  to ask him questions. He was grateful of them not doing so, of course.

 Eren was about to turn left towards the rooms but was yanked backwards. Unable to adjust to the sudden imbalance, he fell to the ground, landing on his back. He groaned, trying to block out the pain stabbing behind his head. Above him, he saw a certain brunette with glasses looking down at him with a wide grin. Looking at that grin of hers made his heart pump faster. Hanji rarely ambushed him, and certainly never outside his room.

“H-Hanji, do you need something?” He asked, trying to be polite.

“Ah, Eren! Sorry for surprising you.” She quickly apologized before pulling him up. “But I have something to ask you though!”

_Oh great, here comes the questions._

“Do you think you can spare a whole day for me tomorrow? I have some experiments I need to test out on you!” Judging by the glint in her eyes, Eren had a feeling that the experiments involved pain. All of Hanji’s previous experiments on him mostly involved pain, but he still didn’t like it.

Eren nodded, wanting to get the scientist off his back. His sweat was starting to stick to his skin so the faster he could get Hanji to bother someone else, the faster he could feel the cold water splashing against his skin. When Hanji didn’t appear to have anything more to say, he took it as his cue to leave. But then a hand grabbing onto his arm stopped him. “Wait, I have something else to say.” Somehow, Eren had a feeling it didn’t involve titans or any of her experiments. “Levi told me you confessed to him.”

It kinda took Eren all his willpower just to not slap his own face. “W-when did you hear that?” There wasn’t any point in denying it since Levi rarely lies to anyone. But maybe he could delay people from uncovering the truth. To be honest, he just wanted his little secret to remain between him and the corporal.

“Ooh! So it is true!” Eren should have thought better than to hide things from Hanji, of course. “You really like him, don’t you?” At this point, Eren was just looking down at the floor, trying to keep the blush out of his face.

“I know, it’s weird and I better move on. He probably has a lover waiting for him already. You know, someone pretty and clever.” Eren said, trying to sound casual like he didn’t care. But honestly the words pained him and hearing himself say it was even more hurting.  For the past few weeks he had continued fantasizing about Levi, to hear himself say those words was like taking a knife and stabbing himself repeatedly.

“Oh, Eren, are you really going to give up just like that?” Hanji slung an arm over Eren, putting weight on him, making him unable to escape from her. There was just no way she’s letting him go without a proper conversation about Eren’s almost non-existent love-life.

Though Eren wanted nothing more than hiding his face in the showers, Hanji’s words did catch his attention. “Eren, we’re living in a world filled with titans that are ready to eat us. Take a little risk, your heart won’t die from rejections.” With that, she bid Eren goodbye and left him standing at the hallway, wondering how his day could any worse.

\--

The next few days went by quickly. Eren was so caught up with his training and being experimented, he couldn’t even find the time to think. He couldn’t even remember the last time he thought of anything other than whether he would survive another day. He confessing to Levi seem like such a long time ago, he was starting to get used to talking to Levi again like nothing had ever happened. He was also almost convinced that his feelings were fading away, telling himself that it was just a foolish teenage crush. It had been days since Hanji ambushed him outside the dormitories and ever since then she hadn’t spoken to him regarding his feelings for the corporal. Eren was thankful of that, of course.

     Then there he was, sitting at the lunch table with his friends again. The events from days ago were never brought up(Jean tried once but only ended up being shut up by Mikasa), but there were still glances towards him from time to time. Armin, being the supportive best friend, avoided asking how he was, afraid that Eren might just end up in another blow up. Mikasa was just itching to ask how her brother was, but she didn’t want to get on his bad side so she just pretended along with the others. No one spoke about it, but Eren was sure as hell that they were all thinking it.

     “Hey guys, where is Jean?”

     Eren looked at Armin, just realizing that the horseface was nowhere to be seen. His usual seat was empty and Eren wondered how he had missed that. Now that he thought about it, the table sure was more quiet without he and Jean’s constant bickering. The only ones who were engaged in a lively conversation were Sasha and Connie.

     “I haven’t seen him since this morning.” Armin said, scrunching up his eyebrows like he was worried.

     “I saw him this morning though. Didn’t he say that Corporal Levi wanted to meet him?” Connie piped in.

     Eren stared at Connie, processing his words. _Corporal Levi wanted to meet Jean? But why?_  He felt himself growing hot and his fist clenching. He wanted to scold himself for letting such a small matter to get to him. What was he getting so jealous about? It was only his crush wanting to meet his rival, all alone in his office. That moment, ideas of what the both of them might be doing in a closed room flooded Eren’s mind.

     All of a sudden everyone became quiet and Eren quickly looked around, wondering what made them shut up. He saw Jean taking a seat next to Armin and slouched. Once he realized everyone’s eyes were on him, he blurted, “What? Did I shat my pants or something?”

     Feeling uncomfortable, Eren stood up and left the table without a goodbye to his friends. He could feel their eyes burning holes into his back, but he stiffened his spine and walked out of the place like it didn’t affect him. Down the corridors, he wondered if this was how jealousy was like. Sure, he had no right to be jealous since technically Levi wasn’t his, but why would he call Jean into his office instead of Eren? Did he not trust him enough?

     His footsteps slowed as he was about to pass the corporal’s office. At the sight of the door wide open, Eren felt an urge to walk right in and demand why he had call for Jean, but he didn’t. It was childish and Levi didn’t like childish. So Eren ended up standing in front of his office, caught in a self-debate whether or not to knock on the door. “This is stupid.” Eren muttered under his breath. He was about to leave and head back to his room when the door swung open, revealing his beloved Levi who was fixing his cravat. He wished the floor could just open up and swallow him that instant; getting caught by Levi was an embarrassment he would never get over.

     “Oi, are you coming in or not? Can you think any louder, brat?” Eren smiled, liking how Levi called him ‘brat’. It was no cute nickname, but somehow it was endearing. His tone was never harsh even though it was nowhere near gentle either.

     Without a second of hesitation, Eren walked right in with a sheepish smile on his face. Levi didn’t say anything besides walking over to his desk and plopping down on his chair before resuming his paperwork. Eren saw a pile of papers stacked neatly at the edge of the corporal’s desk; he couldn’t help but smile a little at how Levi was a neat freak. After awhile, it was clear that Levi wasn’t going to talk to him anytime soon so he just stood there awkwardly like a dog waiting for orders. _Well, this is awkward._ Eren thought.

     “I see Kirschtein delivered the message.” Eren glanced at Levi, confusion written all over his face.

     “What message?”

     “I told him to get you.” Eren felt a blush creeping up on him. _Levi told Jean to get me? But why?_  He tried not to think too much, Levi had made it very clear to him that he didn’t return his feelings. But he was still curious though.

     “S-sir, why didn’t you just ask me to come here instead? Why go through so much trouble?”

     Levi looked up from his paper and glared at Eren with cold grey eyes. “Are you an idiot? You just confessed to me, what would people think if I called for you directly?” _Oh._  His heart beat started to race, he could almost hear his heart going _thump-thump_ against his chest.

     “Um why exactly did you call for me, sir?”

     “Eren, you love me, right?” Eren almost flinched at how direct Levi was. Instead of answering him, he just nodded. He quickly looked up again when he heard the corporal coughing. It was then he realized Levi looked paler and a little greener than usual. Was he sick? “If you love me, you’ll take good care of me when I’m sick, right?” Green eyes widening slightly, Levi laughed softly against the back of his hand, only to disguise it with a cough.

     “Yes sir!” All laughter and coughing ceased, leaving a very surprised Levi. He’d expected the kid to maybe stutter or denied, but surprisingly he found it refreshing to see Eren being direct as well. He was about to say something when he started coughing again. Oh how he hated being sick, it was just one of those days when even Humanity’s Strongest would get sick. He could feel a flu coming up and his head was hurting like hell. It was a miracle that Eren was still standing there without losing a limb or two.

     “Eren.”

     “Yes, corporal?”

     “Call me Levi when it’s just the both of us.” Eren grinned as if he had won the lottery. His happiness was quickly replaced with worry as soon as Levi broke into a coughing fit. He felt his heart clenched at the sight of Levi looking weaker than usual. “Eren, grab a blanket.”

     As soon as Eren bolted out the door to retrieve a blanket, Levi leaned back into his seat to catch his breath. _Why is my heart beating so fast?_ He wondered. While waiting for the brunette to come back, Levi tried to focus on the paperwork Erwin had left him. The words danced around the page, making his headache worsen. He sighed, giving up on trying to get any work done.

     “Levi...I’m...back...” The sound of Eren panting made Levi raised an eyebrow.

     “What? Did you ran a fucking marathon just for a stupid blanket?”

     “Huh? No, I just ran to my room to get my blanket.” Levi tried his best not to smack his own face at Eren failing to recognize his sarcasm. Eren was just...Eren, Levi thought. He took the blanket from him and forced himself up before staggering over to his couch. He hated how his body was so weak, how was he going to fight if a titan just happened to show up?

     “Eren, come here.”

     Eren complied, walking over to sit on the couch, keeping a decent distance between Levi and himself. He tensed up when Levi situated himself right next to him, pressing their arm against each other. They didn’t speak, Eren just let himself enjoy being next to the one he loved while Levi was having his own internal debate. His tense shoulders had loosen, his headache subsided a bit, and all because he was next to Eren. _Why is he so warm? Why is he so tense? Why is my heart beating so fast? Why is it so comfortable? Why do I like having him around? Why does his presence make me feel...reassured?_

Before he could get any answers to his questions, Levi felt his eyelids getting heavier. He was so tired and so comfortable at the same time, he knew it wouldn’t be long before he was asleep.

 --

Eren looked at the sleeping figure beside him. Levi had his head resting on his shoulders. He focused on the steady breathing of the corporal’s and also how his face looked a lot younger without the constant glares. Maybe this was how he would look like without the titans around, Eren thought.

     His eyes dropped to Levi’s lips, feeling his face getting warm all over again. _I can’t help but like him. I’m so stupid!_ But somehow, he finally understood Hanji and also the reason why his best friend would date someone when he had literally no time to waste on things other than planning new attack strategies. There was no telling when any one of them could lose their life fighting. All they could do was appreciate the time they have with the ones they love. Eren glanced at Levi’s sleeping face one more time before placing a soft kiss on his forehead, careful as to not wake him.

     “I hope you look my way one day...” 


	3. Constant Thoughts

Levi woke up sometime later as the evening light shone through the windows, landing right on his face. The first thing he realized was the red-ish orange glow penetrating through his windows. His headache had subsided, leaving him with a red nosed flu. He groaned, feeling his neck ached a bit. When he glanced up, he found the reason to the soreness. His head had been resting on Eren’s shoulder for-what? Hours?-so long at a particular angle that when he tried craning his neck, it ached.

     “Eren.”

     Eren groaned and muttered something in his sleep, his face looking as peaceful as ever. Levi glared at him so hard that he might just burn holes through the boy’s skull. He still felt a bit weak, but there was sufficient energy for him to just nudge the boy, earning a groan from the younger man.

     “What the hell, I was sleeping!” Eren complained, instantly jerking awake. “Oh.” Levi watched, amused as Eren’s cheek reddened.

     “Watch your mouth, brat.”

     “Yes, s-Levi.” Eren corrected himself quickly, remembering how he was told to call him by his real name from now on. “Sir, how long did we-?”

     Judging by the clouds outside, Levi guessed it was about four to five in the evening. They had been sleeping the whole day and none of them noticed it until hours later. “At least five hours, I guess.” Levi quickly took the blanket off him and folded it neatly before placing it on the couch. He got up and stretched, feeling his muscles unwind. Behind him, Eren sat there looking at him groggily, still not fully recovered from waking up all of a sudden. “Go bathe and I’ll see you at dinner.”

     Eren didn’t need to be told twice before he bolted for the door. As soon as Levi heard the door clicked, he sighed and decided that he needed a bath as well. Who knew how many germs could have accumulated on him while sleeping next to the boy for hours? Just the thought of having dirt or sweat on him made Levi cringe and shudder.

     The minute he reached his room, he fumbled for his towel before entering his own private bathroom. Everyone in the Survey Corps knew how obsessed the Corporal was about cleanliness, so instead of having him complain all the time about the hygiene of having to share bathrooms with them, the commander finally gave in and provided him with his own bathroom. It did please Levi to have his bathroom clean and pristine; the only problem was to find the time to clean the freaking place.

     In the bathroom, Levi tossed his towel on a rack and quickly stripped himself as the water accumulated in the tub. Once it was full, he wasted no time in getting in and let himself soak in the water. There, in the quietness of his bathroom, his thoughts were louder. Somehow, he found his thoughts drifting back to the brat’s sleeping face. He had wondered how the boy-turn-titan could look so innocent and peaceful after everything he’d went through.

     He could vividly recall the softness of Eren’s brown hair against his cheek, and also the warmth radiated from the boy that Levi seemed to enjoy. _What am I doing? Eren’s a man, and he’s half my age!_ Levi’s rational side was trying to convince him to not think about the Jaeger brat in that manner, but somehow the more he tried to force Eren out of his mind, the clearer his face in his mind became. The worst part was how much he felt oddly cold without the boy next to him, despite the warmth provided by the waters.

     _I love you, Heichou._

How long has it been since Eren confessed to him? A week? Two weeks? No matter how long time has passed since then, Levi could still remember it as plain as day. The way Eren had blushed, how he fidgeted uncomfortably as he worked his confidence up to confess. _There I go, thinking about that stupid brat again._ But if he was being honest with himself, he didn’t actually hate the attention he was receiving from Eren. When the boy thought Levi hadn’t been paying attention on him, he would stare from afar. Levi could swear the boy sighed sometimes. Strangely, he didn’t find it disgusting, he found it rather...endearing.

     _This boy is going to be the death of me._ Levi grunted, realizing that he hadn’t even soap himself after soaking for so long. On the other side of the door, someone was knocking and saying loudly, “Have you drown in there, Levi?” _Curse that four eyes._ “By the way, you both look cute sleeping like that, it made you two look so innocent and defenceless!” A vein twitched in Levi as he restrained himself from opening the door and choked Hanji who would probably only laughed even more at his face.

     So instead, he quickly rinsed himself thoroughly before stepping out from the bath tub. Before the cold breeze could freeze him, he wrapped a towel around himself, ignoring the droplets falling from his dark raven hair. As soon as the door swung open, Levi saw Hanji backing away to the far corner of his room, a sheepish smile still obvious on her face. Instead of choking the titan lover to death like how Levi _wanted_ to, he ignored her huge grin as he began clothing himself.

     Despite how annoying he found Hanji could be, they were still friends for a long time and they went through many things together. Losing friends, watching their comrades die in the hands of titans, and fighting side by side. He could still remember her as one of the few who actually welcomed him to the Survey Corps after the incident with Erwin. So dressing in front of her wasn’t really much of a big deal, he could bet that she’d seen more naked titan bodies than she should in one lifetime. _She must have seen Eren butt naked several time as well while experimenting on him._

Levi slapped a hand to his face, wondering why on earth his thoughts had returned to that brat again. Behind him, he heard Hanji completely failing to hide her amusement. “Thinking about Eren again, Leviii~?”

     “Get out!” He grabbed his belt and threw it at her direction, missing only by a few inches. Hanji let out a bark of laughter as she trotted out of the room, leaving Levi half-naked, frustrated, and utterly confused.

\--

“So where have you been all day, Eren?” Jean snickered at Eren as soon as he returned from the bathroom. Armin, Reiner and Jean were hanging out when he entered. Automatically, three pair of eyes latched onto him as if he had a magnetic pull on them.

     Upon hearing Jean’s question, Eren felt himself blush all over again. He had tried his best to look as normal as possible, he even practiced while bathing. Why must his emotions be so readable? He hoped by looking away his friends wouldn’t notice his obvious embarrassment, but he was a second too late. Because as soon as he did turn his head away, Reiner smirked and said, “Someone got some action with the corporal.”

     “What?! No! W-we were just sleeping, it’s nothing!” As soon as he said those words, he immediately regretted it. He saw smirks forming on all three of their faces. _Armin, you too?!_  He wished a hole would just open up and swallow him, saving him from the embarrassment that was yet to follow.

     “Ah, so you were with the corporal.” Armin nodded understandingly before shutting the book he was reading.

     Just then, Eren let out a loud sneeze, feeling himself shudder. “What?”

     Armin sat up straighter; a concern look crossed his face. “Eren, are you sick?”

     Eren waved his hand frantically. “No-no, Levi was sick and I think I might have-what?” The smirks were back on his friends’ faces.

     “Did you just call him ‘Levi’? Are you both on first name terms now?” Jean’s smirk grew wider, if that was even possible. Frustrated and embarrassed, he stomped out of the room, ignoring how childish he might have looked. Once he was standing out in the hallway, he found it easier to breathe again and that his heart was thumping rapidly against his chest. His feelings for Levi weren’t much of a secret anymore; he’d found out that every secret would be found out sooner or later in the Survey Corps. Apparently, many people loved to gossip when they know they might die anytime.

     _Stop blushing, stupid!_ Eren scolded himself for being such a girl. So what if he had feelings for Levi? Why must he act like a girl, blushing all the time at the mention of Levi? _That’s because you’re in love, idiot._ Oh great, now his thoughts even sounded like Levi.

     Eren sighed, sinking to the ground before pulling his legs to his chest. “I’m going crazy.”

\--

Dinner time rolled around and Levi found it awkward once again, sitting at the table. Hanji had practically dragged the poor boy all the way to their table while giggling like shit. Poor Eren was blushing as red as a tomato while keeping his gaze anywhere but Levi. And Levi found that slightly irritating. But guilt won over as soon as he realized Eren was down with the flu, sniffling and sneezing as he desperately tried to stop.

     “It’s your fault, Levi!” Levi scowled at Hanji for her sudden outburst. “Now you’ve made him sick after all the cuddling you guys did in your office.” Levi saw his squad members’ eyes widening and stopped eating midway. Eren, on the other hand, looked like he was hoping a titan would appear and gobble him up before he could get anymore embarrassed.

     Somehow the sight of Eren blushing made him excited. “Eren.”

     Eren looked up at the sound of his name being called. “Yes, sir?”

     “Are you...sick because of me? Tell me the truth, that’s an order.”

     Eren hesitated, wondering if he would get kicked for telling the truth. But he guessed that Levi wouldn’t appreciate sweet lies so he forced himself to say, “Yes...sir.”

     Levi sighed before pushing his chair backwards as he stood. His squad members quickly averted their gaze to focus on their food. Hanji was looking at them both, amusement flickering in her eyes. Levi had never acted awkward before so she found it interesting to watch.

     Levi walked over to where Eren was before pulling the boy up by the arm. “Are you done with food?”

     “I’m not really that hungry.” Was the response he received.

     Whatever, he could care less if the boy starved due to politeness anyway. So together the both of them exited the dining hall, quietness enveloped them both again when they were in the hallway. It was a comfortable silence as both of them walked side by side, shoulders barely brushing and hands restrained from touching each other. Levi wondered why he was acting this way, when he should be completely disgusted by the boy’s affections. But he found it impossible to not care about Eren, he was constantly worried about him.

     “Are you tired?” He asked, expecting to get silence from the boy.

     “A bit, Levi.”

     Levi tried not to flinch. He was still trying to get used to having Eren calling him by his first name. Sure, he had suggested it and so it was probably his fault, but it was strange to hear it in Eren’s voice. It sounded like a melody, sweet and smooth. _He loved it._

     “Come on.” They took the long way round to Eren’s room. It was an unspoken agreement. Whether the brat realized it or not, Levi wasn’t sure. He just wanted to enjoy that reassured feeling when he was with Eren. Maybe it’s because Eren was strong, a titan-shifter with amazing abilities that made him seemed more likely to stay by his side. Levi had seen too many of his comrades fall, so it has been a long time since he felt that way. Eren was young, he was strong, but Levi knew he couldn’t be permanent either.

     Upon reaching Eren’s room, they stood there, staring at the wooden door not speaking to each other. Finally, Levi broke the silence. “Rest well, okay? I need you ready to fight; I can’t have you sick and weak.” He said, not looking at the brunette.

     Eren smiled softly, liking how Levi showed concern for him. “Okay.”

     He reached out to turn the knob, pushing the door open. “Eren.”

     “Hmm?”

     “I’m sorry.” Levi said, finally meeting Eren’s eyes. _Why must the brat be taller?!_

Eren let out a soft chuckle before shaking his head. “It’s okay. Goodnight...Levi.” Without waiting for Levi’s response, he gently closed the door and sank to his knees, thinking that if he spent another minute with Levi, he might lose it. Just as he heard footsteps fading away, he sworn he could have heard a faint whisper saying, “Goodnight, Eren.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had this a long time on my laptop, just didn't have the time to actually post it! *sorry* So anyways, Merry Christmas everyone! :D


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